Womanhood

Let's Play Pretend - Part II

A little while back, I wrote the first part to this article of Let’s Play Pretend. In this particular article, I want to take a closer look at how we prevent living divided lives as leaders. Revisit Let’s Play Pretend - Part I.

It’s never our desire to harm others. Rarely does a leader intentionally hurt or offend. It can often be attributed to any of the following:

  1. Overworked schedules, and striving for success.

  2. Unending conflict within the church.

  3. Over-identifying with the needs of those they lead.

  4. Lack of accountability or unwillingness to admit failure.

  5. Pride and an unwillingness to submit to regular self-examination led by the Spirit.

  6. Unawareness of the impact of family of origin.

  7. Lack of boundaries and healthy stewardship of power.

  8. Doing more for God than being with God.

  9. Self-protection in the form of severely private lives and lack of close community.

  10. Need to please others, unwilling to deal with conflict, etc.

  11. Misunderstanding of temperament and self-care accordingly.

This list is truly not exhaustive. It’s symptoms I have seen in my own life, in others, and in research as I have studied what it means to lead wholeheartedly.

Whatever the cause, the result remains in a harm that is extended to self and others.

Behavior modification would never be enough - simply because we are powerless to lead with integrity and wholeness on our own. We must have the Spirit of God within that leads us to inward transformation - the overflow of life that truly bears lasting fruit. The fullness of the Spirit in the life of a believer calls for regular self-examination as the Psalmist cried - Search me Oh God, and see if there be any anxious way in me. It calls for transformation from the inside out, a willingness to consistently allow Christ all the way in and invite the Spirit of God into the deepest recesses of our soul.

For example, take the spiritual and religious leaders of Jesus’ day. Divided lives were the way of the Pharisee’s, the religious leaders in Christ’s day. And the harm they did to those around them in their communities was devastating. Christ never held back from calling them out. In one common occurrence when Jesus is teaching to the crowds, - Jesus states directly to the religious leaders and those speaking out against him:

“Jesus replied, “I did one miracle on the Sabbath, and you were amazed. But you work on the Sabbath, too, when you obey Moses’ law of circumcision. (Actually, this tradition of circumcision began with the patriarchs, long before the law of Moses.) For if the correct time for circumcising your son falls on the Sabbath, you go ahead and do it so as not to break the law of Moses. So why should you be angry with me for healing a man on the Sabbath? Look beneath the surface so you can judge correctly.”” John 7:21-24 NLT

In essence, Jesus is saying “check your own actions, motives, and heart”. You look good on the outside but it’s not lining up with what’s beneath the surface on the inside”. 

As leaders, we often spend more time dealing with the external rather than the internal. We deal with others behavior, we call out others motives, and we fix systems and activities. Rarely taking the extended time to examine, call out and hear from God for ourselves.

“Do right” all you want, but if your motives and heart is not pure or in alignment-it falls flat and harms.

We see this again in Matthew 23:25-27 - Jesus is rebuking the spiritual leaders for the divided lives the lead. “What sorrow awaits you teachers of religious law and you Pharisees. Hypocrites! For you are so careful to clean the outside of the cup and the dish, but inside you are filthy—full of greed and self-indulgence! You blind Pharisee! First wash the inside of the cup and the dish, and then the outside will become clean, too. “What sorrow awaits you teachers of religious law and you Pharisees. Hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs—beautiful on the outside but filled on the inside with dead people’s bones and all sorts of impurity.”

Dr. Alicia Britt Chole posted this thought just a few days ago, and it speaks so much to the harm of a divided leader.

“Positional authority without personal integrity will inevitably become abusive.”

In Part I of this post, we used Peter Scazzero’s definition of integrity…“Integrity is when who I am on-stage is the same as who I am backstage. It is when there is no separation between what is going on inside of me and what I am expressing outside of me. There is no separation of my inner and outer life.”

This includes hidden and secret sin, but it goes much deeper than that. It’s becoming aware of who we are in Christ, and allowing ourselves to express that fully. It’s realizing that it’s okay not to be okay, and we surround ourselves with a community that we can be vulnerable and transparent with in the ups and downs of this life. We reach beyond ourselves to counselors, coaches, mentors, and pastors. We allow those that we lead to see that we are not perfect, and that we are just as human and in need of grace as they are.
We seek to discover the impact of our family origin, and the ways we self-protect to keep people out.

There is no true perfect solution to this - but there is grace-filled surrender. As we surrender wholeheartedly to Christ, we invite Him all the way in to full transform us from the inside out.

Here are a few simple steps to begin giving space to this transformation: 

1. Lead self-aware. You gain self awareness by hearing the voice of the Spirit through intentional times of self examination and repentance. Here are just a few ways to practice this regularly: receive insight from assessments, invite in a counselor to help you unpack your past and family of origin, learn from skilled authors and teachers that can guide you, find a coach or spiritual director, etc.

2. Establishing regular spiritual practices of silence, solitude, and slowing down to be with Jesus so that you can discern His voice in the midst of daily life. 

3. Invite accountability and a close community that you will allow to know you inside and out-failures, temptations, and all. Make an intentional choice to be vulnerable.  

4. Invite Jesus beyond the surface and into the depths. Challenge your own perceptions of Scripture and the world around you - and then invite the Spirit to speak.  

5. Journal the process.

These are just a few steps! I am learning regularly that this process is an ongoing journey of transformation that we must acknowledge and intentionally invite into our lives as people, but especially as leaders. If we want to love and live wholeheartedly - loving God and others with all of our heart, soul, strength, and mind - we must make intentional effort to seek after integrity and wholeness. The Spirit of God will empower the transformation if we give the invitation!

…written by Christan Causey

…written by Christan Causey

The Art of Wholehearted

The battle lies in the division of who we are privately and who we are publically. As much as we desire to be wholly undivided, most of humanity will be drawn into division. It's part of our nature. Yet, in Christ - fragmentation, this brokenness can be mended into a beautiful wholeness. It's only possible with Christ in us.

Wholehearted. What does it mean to be wholehearted?

Merriam-Webster would define this term as “completely and sincerely devoted, determined, or enthusiastic…marked by complete and earnest commitment…free from all reserve or hesitation.”

Over the last several years, I have learned and studied wholeheartedness. I have looked at it from the perspective of qualified authors, Spirit-led counseling, and - mostly importantly - from the Word of God and trying to learn the heart of our Father.

I like Merriam-Webster’s definition, but I feel it’s missing the context of Scripture. Scriptures come to mind such as Luke 10:27 - “Love the Lord with all your heart, soul, and strength - love your neighbor as yourself” and 1 These. 5:23 - “Now may the God of peace himself sanctify you completely, and may your whole spirit and soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.”

Scriptures like these give us a glimpse of what biblical wholeheartedness could look like.

Sincere devotion is just simply devotion when not integrated with authenticity. Free from all reserve and hesitation is not possible without inward transformation. Is it? It’s as though, it’s a “this must proceed that”. To live wholeheartedly, we must be wholehearted. Rather to live and be wholehearted, we must welcome and invite the transformation of becoming wholehearted.

I think of people like Paul, Naomi, Ruth, Esther, Mary, Peter, Moses, Abraham, and David. And so, so many more. Men and women who lived their lives fully devoted to Christ, not through perfection, but rather through brokenness and mess. These people were a hot mess. Much like you and me. 

But in all of their hot mess, they devoted everything to Christ and the people around them - in vulnerability and in passion. 

God calls us to community and impact. Yet, we certainly cannot make a fully loving impact when we are withholding and withdrawing from others. Whether it be out of fear or insecurity, whether we are fully convinced we are not good enough - or simply uncertain about our purpose. I truly believe God calls us to live vulnerably and authentically as we passionately live out our purpose for Him and through Him. We do this in community with God and others. 

To be wholehearted, to live wholehearted - we must be made whole. Don’t misunderstand, by no means do I mean we must be perfect. Perfection is not our aim. Scripture states in Matthew 5:48, "be Holy as I am Holy" or "be perfect as I am perfect". Can we really achieve the holiness or perfection of God? No. If we look at the context and meaning of this word “perfect” - the original word is “teleioi” in the Greek which translates as “completeness (fully grown)” in your understanding or in your thinking. Be made whole or undivided.  

God is made up of three parts, Father, Son, Holy Spirit - yet operates as a whole; much the same, according to scripture, we are made up of three parts - body, soul, spirit. 

And, God calls us to wholeness. How can that be expressed, lived out?

For our specific purposes, we are looking at the question of how can I be made whole - how can I live out wholeheartedness? How can I be transformed wholly and completely in Christ?

So often, we allow transformation in the external parts of our lives. We change our habits, we adjust our schedules and diets, we talk better, act better, perform better. Nonetheless, we feel broken - fragmented. Pieces of ourselves remain hidden and unseen both to the community around us, but most sadly to the God who created us. 

We live fragmented lives. We withdraw and protect - and it is not just from community. We do this from God, himself.

It seems silly, I know. How do you hide and withdraw from God who knows and sees all? It’s the beautiful and yet, treacherous act of free will and choice. He will not force himself on us, but He waits patiently for us to open our WHOLE heart to Him - to allow Him to transform us completely and wholly - and to surrender wholeheartedly in our journey with HIm. IF we were to do this, it would change us from the inside out - and as we are changed from the inside out the overflow will be to live fully and authentically with God AND with OTHERS. Living wholeheartedly in community with God and others. 

What would happen in our families, neighborhoods, churches, and workplace if we were to allow wholehearted transformation that flows into wholehearted community?

This is what we hope to look at, focus on, and discover in 2018 with this community of women. Are you in? Are you “wholeheartedly” in? This means we will be committed to sharing our stories. It means we will be vulnerable and honest. And, we will work out our salvation through the gut-wrenching act of God reaching deep inside of us and revealing all of the ways we are broken and fragmented.

We will watch in awe as Christ works transformation in the deepest recesses of our soul and spirit, and reveals a beautiful outward life of wholehearted surrender and devotion. We will rejoice and celebrate as we journey towards the beautiful reward of a wholehearted life. We invite you to join us!

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...written by Christan Causey

Bold Enough to Show Up

A few days ago on March 8 it was International Women's Day. And, I must be honest that until yesterday I didn't know it was a thing. Yet as I scrolled through my newsfeed and saw all of these wonderful posts making sweet declarations affirming womanhood, I immediately felt insane pressure. 

What's wrong with me, I thought? Here I am a newly appointed director of a ministry and network for women, and I have failed to acknowledge THE day to recognize women. 

Why? What is it that causes us to feel pressure to measure up? Why do we insist on comparing notes? 

For generations, women have had to fight for a place at the table. Do a historical study of women and the role of women in society and family, and you will find our roots as women run deep in insecurity, inadequacy, comparison, performance, and so much more. Is it any wonder, as women, we most often struggle with the same things generations of women before us struggled with?

In the end, I decided not to post from the Women of Influence site. 

For those that were like me - here's a little background. This is a designated day for the world to recognize the power and value of women in history and present in our world. International Women's Day is celebrated on March 8 every year, and it commemorates the movement for women's rights, and honors the achievements of women. 

And while this day of celebration for women in our world has come and gone - I am regularly reflecting on what God says about women. I am thankful for the freedom and opportunities I now have in this country as a woman, but it fails in comparison to the true and full freedom I have as a woman in Christ. 

We must know as Christ followers, we no longer have to fight for our place at the table-we simply have to show up. Christ will do the work in us and through us, we simply have to make ourselves available. We have to say yes. Or hearts so desperately desire freedom and a full life. We want to do great things and we long to make an impact on our world. This isn't our idea, though. This was God's. His mission since the beginning of time was the redemption of humanity and He invites us in on the mission daily. This mission is the same for us as women as it is for the men. And, however He calls you to live out this mission-just say yes. 

I am scared out of my mind in my current endeavors, including this one as your leader! I regularly feel like I might fail at any given moment. And, then, I do fail in moments! I lean fully on His help and His grace. 

But here's the thing, we don't have to worry about measuring up or meeting the standard. We can stand confident that our identity is found in our Savior and Him alone, and He has already offered us a seat at the table. So just show up.

Vulnerably show up to what God has for you. He will open doors and set you on paths you never imagined. If you are willing, He will use you to be a part of His redemption in your family, your community, and your church. Step out, take risks, be courageous-allow His Spirit to work in you. 

From the beginning of time, God breathed life into woman and said it was good. From the beginning of time, women walked with strength and purpose, and changed the world. We can celebrate the beauty of God's creation of woman. And, we recognize the powerful role that women fill in the family, workplace, community, and church. 

Like all of humanity, women fall and fail. But we partake in the grace and mercy offered to us by our Creator. When we do fall, may we rise with dignity and humility. When we are broken and bruised, may we find restoration and redemption in the One who calls us good-the only One who truly makes us good. When we feel weak and without purpose, may we rise and lead in the grace given to us by the One who calls us to purpose. 

May we walk in the power not of ourselves, but of Christ our Savior. We fear God, and nothing else. In God's infinite wisdom, He knew women were of value and importance and set each of us on our course. And, with Christ in us, we will continuing changing history for every life we touch. 

All we have to do is show up and live it out loud in faith. 

Praying today you feel the boldness and confidence from Christ in you,

Christan

Written By : Christan Causey

Written By : Christan Causey